I am massively insecure. According to those fabulous brain-boxes who made books to help us understand words, that means that I am “unsafe or not fully assured, not free from fear or doubt,” all coming from the Medieval Latin word insecurus. Now to me the word insecurus sounds like some awesome magic spell. Sigh, if only it were. If only I just had to wave a glorified twig and yell “insecurus!” at the top of my lungs in my best homeland accent and I would magically believe in myself in every way. If only. Now before we cue up some tragic violin music to accompany this thought, let me finish. I only share this with you, because I know I am not the only one who feels like this. I know that many, if not all, of you sat there reading this are quietly nodding your head wishing for that same magical spell for one reason or another. And you know what, that’s ok.
As far as I see it, insecurities are a bit like untied shoelaces. Here we are, happily trudging along the road of life. Ahead in the distance is something new. Something we haven’t experienced before. We take a few more steps towards it and BAM! we fall. Those damn shoelaces; those damn insecurities trip us up. “What if something bad happens? What if I fail? What will people think?….” For many, including me, the internal monologue can be endless and deafening and can bring us to our knees. But somehow we get back up, we take a few more steps and maybe we get there, maybe we trip again. My question is, why do we not just tie the shoelaces? Why is it so hard for us to face and deal with our insecurities? Do we gain something by feeding into them? Or is it easier to stay stuck with them because they are familiar, than to face the uncertainty of how to deal with them?
I am very much about perspective. Sometimes I think we just need to look at something differently to understand it better. So what if, the untied shoe laces/the insecurities are just supposed to serve as a little awareness jolt, but we are misinterpreting them. It’s not supposed to be a permanent problem but just a “hey, just making sure you are ok, making good choices and by the way you’ve totally got this and even if it doesn’t work out, you’ll get through it” moment. Making us take that moment to remind ourselves what we are capable of, not what we are lacking. Who knows. Might be true, might not. But for now, next time that little voice starts in my head I think I am going mentally try to take my pseudo-magical-twig, yell “insecurus!” and imagine my shoelaces being tied in award-winning-style! I suggest you try the same. And maybe, just maybe, they will stay tied for us all. Good day to you, lovely people.